Once in time I set my sail,
Onward till the winds did fail:
Stranded I in stagnant seas,
Alone in desperate quarantine.
Though I'd shout I was not heard —
Days did pass and time it blurred.
I was lost and left behind
In the prison of my mind.
World did you not see me there?
Lost of words and vacant stare?
Dream, why did you turn on me?
When in you I did believe?
Rowing with my hands and feet,
Through the waters of defeat,
I made shore to lands forgot,
Back again and me, hardfought.
Raymond
1:49am wednesday, 16th january
Alone and lost
You tought you were
In the ocean of your mind
People were there to help you through
Confused and dazed
Your mind in a maze
Yesterday is just a glimmer
Today you are a hero
The story you have told
Has helped a hundred fold
Words written on screen
Given hope to people unseen
Carry on Carry on
Today;tommorrow;for evermore
Thanks Stand from me to you
May if time be kind
We meet one day
Friends we may be
Through this computer screen of mine.
cheryl
7:11am wednesday, 16th january
Why are some days so hard? I was so cruel to myself today terribly negative thoughts and distorded views that took hours to get out of. My medication is the perfect balance so the Doctor said last week and I agreed with her so why then did I have such a hard time today? On normal days which are very frequent I have dreams of maintained sanity from then on. I've only had two major episodes in the last 14 years the last one being three years. I should be all better I'm taking the meds regularly. Between 1993 and 1998 I took myself off any medication accept alcohol and I was fine. Now I'm the meds and it's been three years since my last episode so why am I having bad days?
Stand
7:19am wednesday, 16th january
I have those days, too. Those days either when you laboriously force yourself out of bed or wish you'd stayed there, days when your mind acts up in weird ways. I still have minor episodes where I think I'm the Antichrist or that I'm the only real person in the world. They pass, though. Some things, I think, are there only to be endured. Sometimes, though, later on, I find purpose in some of it — that it led to some sort of understanding. I hope you may find this so of your circumstances.
andrea h
2:32pm wednesday, 16th january
Hello again You said you have minor
episodes, I need to know how you feel durring
those times and after please i am working on a
projest that i believe would be helpful
to you and others.
Elvia
3:30pm wednesday, 16th january
For so long I
longed to hear
the words of
winds
Together binded
from shore to sea
in the corner of my mind
Stand
8:45pm wednesday, 16th january
andrea h: Email me, and we'll discuss. Please have specific questions.
Sadsister
1:16am friday, 18th january
My sister doesn't believe the voices she hears comes from her brain. How can I convince her so that she stays on the meds? I wish you all good health and happiness.
Stand
1:22am friday, 18th january
Sadsister: I don't know if you can convince her. If you had tried to convince me, back when I was listening to the voices (some tried), you probably wouldn't have gotten through.
The thing to do is to familiarize yourself with the world she lives in and using logic from her world, make an argument for the meds. Meds are important, though this may be a hard task.
telly
9:39am saturday, 19th january
Sadsister,
it is a wonderful step for you to take to come to places where you can find information about your sister. I don't want you to think I am disrespectful of your wish to help her, but you are not her god. you are her sister and it is not your job to judge your sister, only to love her. Yes, find out information about what your sister is going through, but do not presume that you know what is best for her... have courage, you are not alone. I am not advocating that your sister not take her medication, but at some point, you have to respect the decisions she makes... we are not "incapable" ... we are human beings and need to know that the people that love us will continue to do so, no matter what. Try to understand from the other point of view... instead of asking what you can do to convince your sister to take her meds... find out why she does not want to take them... there are tremendous side effects... and sometimes those side effects are more debilitating than the "symptom" they are trying to alliviate... please remember there is no "cure" for us... and sometimes it is hard for us to remember that others do not experience life the way we do... Like Stand says, learning about the world your sister has to cope with on a day to day basis is hard, but so is living in it!
telly
*******
8:28pm saturday, 19th january
the ability to use words that cause one soul to touch another. just symbols on the keyboard. thank you for expressing what i am unable to with words.
peace
Pam
2:33pm monday, 21st january
Can someone help me with some information? My dad disappeared for 2 days (he just called last night, but won't tell us where he is), and I know he may be undiagnosed schitzophrenic. Is dissappearance a common behavior? This has happened more than once. I write with tears in my eyes because I can't connect with his reasoning. He seems to have paranoia and has said cruel/life damaging things to my mon and myself because he believes things that simply aren't true. He is still married to my mom, and until this episode, he professed to love her a great deal, although during similar episodes he has said bizarre/cruel things to many family members, including myself. This came out of the blue, with seemingly no trigger.
He is diagnosed bipolar, but I believe his paranoia and disappearance may be something more.
Anyhow, to make a long story short, I write for some information. Are dissappearances common in schitzophrenia? Is violent behavior and excessive anger common?
I only care about helping my dad now. He won't tell us where he is, but has said he will return soon. Makes it kind of tough to talk to him/get him help.
Any light on the subject will be greatly appreciated.
God bless.
Stand
1:26am tuesday, 22nd january
Try this link as one of your better resources on schizophrenia. Perhaps you could also sign up for their user forums and ask. Most of my information on schizophrenia is very personal to me, and I may not be of much help in this case. It also sounds like that your father is perhaps bipolar, after all. His disappearances may be results of the "manic" side of his disorder.
Pam
12:53pm tuesday, 22nd january
Thank you Stand. I can tell you are of great help to those who read these links. Best of luck to you!
Raymond
Stand
andrea h
Stand