I once postulated that the world was all made of pain,
that all sensations were merely different flavors of that substance.
Like everything looks like a nail when a hammer’s all you have.
Omen
8:24am friday, 27th may
There is great pleasure when the elephant steps off your foot. Without pain you wouldn't experience it.
I've felt like the elephant has been standing on my foot for a while now, but the fact that I see truth in that statement makes me feel hopeful. I've been taken off my medication just a couple of weeks ago and I don't ever again want to experience what I did.
As for your postulate, Stand, pain is a result of emotions and sensations. It is present within the mind only.
Reflection
9:42am friday, 27th may
Let me put it to you this way stand.You have a cunts hair of making it all the way, and if you do, you'll wish you didn't.The Fuckin END.LET GO OF YOUR FUCKIN EGO, OR ELSE YOU WILL GO NO FURTHER.
Reflection
9:50am friday, 27th may
I hate to do it to you stand, but words don't fuckin matter, you know the truth, now act on it.Strawberry, its time to let go of how rich you are, the spoiled brat can only go so far. Also, stop fuckin everyone, there's lust and love, but the latter requires more misery than you're willing to accept.I'll see you all next time.Remember, let go of the ego, or else you will not pass.
Stand
12:54pm friday, 27th may
Hey, Reflection — chill. I like where I am.
Me?!
6:21pm friday, 27th may
Still interesting to read. Hope the whole job thingy works out for you.
reflection
6:51pm saturday, 28th may
I once thought If you had a pretty wife, you could live by the ocean in a nice hut, and be satisfied. I guess not.Stop the big words stand, it won't take you any farther.
Stand
7:28pm saturday, 28th may
Whatever.
Rich
7:39pm saturday, 28th may
be groovy kids.
Rich
7:42pm saturday, 28th may
Relax and smile, tomorrow we die.
Strawberry
10:30pm saturday, 28th may
A lot of scary stuff.
Reflection, you know, it took me a whole morning to make that card reading for you. I had to look up what the cards meant, meditate on the cards for inspiration, and then type the whole thing onto the site. I just wanted to entertain you. I just wanted to be nice.
Now, reading what you wrote on the last post and this one, my heart is beating fast. I know that the way you write is showing all of us the way you experience the world, but I can't allow myself to be pulled into your painful world. I'm sorry that your head is grey. I'm sorry that you are so very angry. If you say that I have to let go of ego, then I say that you have to let go of anger. Reading your latest words on this website affects my body negatively. I can only guess the stress that your anger is putting on your own body - thus the grey hair. I do believe that there is something higher than the ego, and that is the Spirit world. When I write, I try to share how I experience the world. I can't write like Stand, so I try to be honest, maybe more honest in some ways than Stand or you feels comfortable with - names, dates, who, what, where, body organs - I like details. Since I signed my last post I'm obviously not too worried about privacy.
I believe that inorder to be honest you must have a strong ego. If I'm a fool, or I make myself vulnerable to being called a fool, then doesn't that require a great deal of emotional strength? The ego is the existence of an "I", and what I now believe is that I have been overwhelming you with information about my "I".
It is important to find reasons in life to live. Value can be spiritual and material, because we have eyes to see and bodies to feel, it is illogical to flattly refuse a combinaiton of both. The Spirit works through the ego, but in doing so, I don't think that it explodes or demolishes the ego. I do believe that it is important to be able to point your finger at something and say "this is an extention of me". Some things I do let go of. But some things and people bring me joy - I try to take good care of the things that bring me joy.
Lust and Love, like the spirit and the ego, are perfectly compatable to exist together. As I experience it, the more I love, then the more I lust after the one I love. And where did you get the idea that I'm fucking everyone? I only have sex with the same guy again and again.
For a while, until you speak to Stand and me with respect, I'm not going to address you anymore in my posts Reflection.
Strawberry
10:47pm saturday, 28th may
No, I won't ignor you Reflection. But I must say, it seems like the Devil is messing with your head. You certainly do not walk in the company of angels. Angels give love. The devil I've heard tells lies and one of those lies is that the world is empty and devoid of love. That's the lie I feel when I am suicidal. How can a man who says that he had experienced peace spout so much venom? Stand, do my words pour like poison, do they make you feel ill? Reflection is acting like I attacked him and he is attacking back. He really hurts.
Strawberry
2:09am sunday, 29th may
Hey Stand, I'm going to take a little vacation. I've got to give a lecture on schizophrenia & art on June 11th, it's not quite written yet.........I'm not going to check in at your website for the next two weeks. After June 11th, I'll give you a nice long post discribing how the evening went. Take care of your business Stand. And I'll look forward after June 11th to reading all your posts and the comments I've missed. It worries me, how thin skinned I am. And it is so important that I focus on my work right now. I just don't have the luxury of being upset or involved in drama, at least, when there is a choice involved. Maybe this will help Reflection cool off too. You all mean a lot to me. Two weeks isn't that long.
Bye bye sweetie!
crash
3:59pm saturday, 16th june
There is great pleasure when you recover from a bad bike crash. Without pain from the crash you wouldn't experience it. So was this bike crash just an excuse to flip my bike so I might experience the pleasure of recovering?
Omen
Reflection
Stand
Strawberry